Don’t Let Fear to Hold You Back: How Acknowledging Fear Could be the Key to Fulfilling your Dreams, Attaining Goals, and Living a Life That is Truly Fulfilling

Many people live their lives in constant fear, and more often than not, they do so unconsciously and unintentionally! They don’t even realize that it is fear that’s holding them back! Fear holds us back from doing what we love and what we are meant to do, and this post will help you discover what kinds of fear may be limiting you and what you can do to exterminate the fears and live your fullest, most satisfying life. Take a look at some of the most common fears and see if you’ve ever fallen victim to allowing them to have any control in your life:

Fears are limiting beliefs that inhibit us from taking action and reaching our fullest potential.

1.       Fear of Pain/ disappointment

Number one on the list is the fear of pain or disappointment. Sometimes we don’t pursue certain things in life because we’re too afraid that if we don’t get the results we want, hope, or expect, that we will be hurt or disappointed. Pain and disappointment happen in life regardless of whether we pursue our dreams or not, the only difference is that while pursuing your goals, the pain you experience teaches you how to get closer to that goal, rather than experiencing the pain and remorse of not having tried hard enough to accomplish them. The fear of pain is a common fear that prevents us from reaching our full potential. Sometimes we may distance ourselves from people, or avoid taking risks because we are afraid of being hurt by them.

2.       Fear of Rejection

Next on the list is fear of rejection, another common fear that occurs when we become worried that our ideas or our personality might be rejected by someone we admire, or even popular culture and society. When we think this way and become overly-concerned with what others may think of us—about whether or not they will reject us or accept us—we alter who we are to accommodate the needs and beliefs of what others think we should be, rather than just being ourselves. When this happens, we are allowing the fear of rejection to hold us back and prevent us from taking any real, authentic action, and we act in a way that is not true to who we really are.

3.       Fear Of Other People’s Opinions

Similar to the fear of being rejected, other times, people may allow the fear of what others might think of them to creep in, and as a result, they can’t even lift a finger without worrying what someone else is going to think about it. If that sounds like you, then you’ve allowed the fear of other’s opinion to paralyze you.  It’s important to recognize that you can’t please everyone. If you don’t have any opposition or people who disagree with you, then it means you’re probably trying very hard to please everyone and are therefore compromising who you really are to be a people-pleaser rather than your true and authentic self. What’s ironic is that people appreciate authenticity more than someone who tries to accommodate the needs of everyone yet is fake, inauthentic, or phony in their work, actions, and/or behavior.

4.       Fear Of “Standing Out,” Being Weird, Or “Different”

The fourth kind of fear occurs when we are afraid to “stand out” and be weird, different, or unique—when we become afraid to go against the status quo and not settle for conformity. When we become worried or preoccupied with the idea that we might be thought of as weird, we fear being out-casted and rejected (this links back to #2 and #3) and therefore are held back from being ourselves and living to be our true self. Fear is a form of self-centeredness and is ego-based, and this fear in particular is one of self-absorption because it is the misconception that we are so different and unique from everyone else that no one will be able to relate to us. The truth is that we have a lot more in common with others than we think, and when we are open and authentic with who we really are, people relate and connect with you. The truth is that there are groups of people just waiting for you to be authentic with the world, so that they can appreciate all the unique talents and gifts that you have to offer. If we are willing to break out of our shell and simply be ourselves, without the fear of being different, weird, or unaccepted, we will break this fearful mentality that holds us back and attract people and circumstances that are compatible and in-alignment with our unique individuality.

5.       Fear of Cost

When we have the fear of cost, we worry about things like, “How much time, energy, money, effort, and work is this going to cost me?” When we think these kinds of thoughts, we prevent ourselves from taking action out of fear that it will cost us something without realizing that the payoff in the end may be far greater than the temporary investment. This can apply to anything, like your health, relationships, or career. Any time you make an investment, it will cost you a certain amount of time, energy, or effort, but the thing to keep in mind is that any time you make an investment, if you invest wisely in things that are important to you and matter (like health, relationships, doing what you love, etc.) then there will be a pay-off on that investment.  

6.       Fear of Failure

The last kind of fear is the fear of failure. This one is huge because if you want to get anywhere in life, you’re going to have to realize

that there will be times that you will experience failure. This does not make you a failure; on the contrary you can use failure to your advantage. But many people succumb to the fear of failure and don’t make an effort to even try to attain their goals. Failure is actually how many of the greatest people came to be. Thomas Edison said, “I did not fail 1000 times at making a light bulb, I discovered 1000 ways not to make a light bulb.” Fear itself is ironic in the sense that it is the very things that we are fearful of that can end up being of most benefit to us when we make the conscious decision to use them to our advantage. We can use the very things we are afraid—like failure or rejection—and use that failure or rejection as fuel for reaching new heights and accomplishing new goals. We can channel our failures, rejections, pains, and losses use them for our benefit. I love what Sean Achor, author of The Happiness Advantage says: "The most successful people see adversity not as a stumbling block, but as a stepping-stone to greatness. Indeed, every failure is often the fuel for the very ideas that eventually transform industries, make record profits, and reinvent careers." 

Rather than allowing the things we are fearful of to hold us back, we can channel whatever it is that we are afraid of—failures, rejections, pains, and losses—and  use them to our advantage and good by using them as fuel to our fire and motivation to reach new heights.

As always, I hope you found this post interesting or encouraging, and I wish you all a wonderful week! J